A Kid, A Dad, Language Tricks & Some Cool Tools Of Influence

Hey there my friend, 

I’m so excited you stopped in to read this blog post because,

…as you read, you just might discover some POWERFUL tools that can allow you to continue to influence poeple for the better, 

So you can get even more, of what you want in life.  

A Crazy Story With My 9 Year Old

Yesterday morning, I had just finished hosting the TAGR mastermind and the topic for the day was ‘imagination’, which is law of success #5.    

I walked out of the office because it was time for me to take the kids to school.

My wife starts to tell me this interesting thing that’s happening with my oldest son, Kayden.

See the night before this, we had gone to a place called Ijump, which is this place that has all of these awesome trampolines, where you can jump & throw balls & do flips & stuff. 

You can also jump into these huge foam pits and all sorts of other fun things.

We were having a blast.

I had my Iphone out and we were shooting slow motion videos.

Here’s a cool video I shot while we were there.

In any case, I guess there was a kid there who was being a bit rude to my kids, calling them names & yelling obscenities.

Little bit of a bully, you know?  

Apparently this kid was wearing a basketball jersey.

I actually didn’t know about this because I didn’t see it happen.

So right before school yesterday morning my wife said,

“the funniest thing, you know your son saw this kid wearing this jersey – and this morning he woke up and wanted to wear a jersey to school.

I don’t understand why he would want to model this kid that was saying things, that you know, weren’t the best.”

And she said “Can you talk to him?”

And so I walk outside, after our study of imagination, and I say –

“Take That Off!” 

And I just sort of command him to do it.

And of course, he rejects & refuses and we argue there for just a minute.

And my brilliant wife, says, (in a sort of whisper)…

“See if you can make him think it’s his idea.”

This is actually one of the things that Dale Carnegie talks about in “How To Win Friends And Influence Poeple.”

I call it law of a pleasing personality #10… Make Them Think It’s Their Idea

And so I said to myself, how in the world am I going to make this 9 year old kid, make him think that this thing, he does NOT want to do, is his idea?

How is this even possible – I mean we were arguing back & forth & I’ve got like 5 minutes, to get him from our house to school.

Not a lot of time to work with right?

So, we go load up in the car and I’m racking my brain.

I’m like how am I gonna make him think it’s his idea, I mean he’s set on wearing this Jersey.

How am I gonna do this?

And I’m thinking about Imagination & I was like — OK Paul, now’s the time -put your imagination to the test.

And so as I ask myself, ‘what could I do, what could I do, what could I do?”

I think about some of the things I’ve been learning recently, in my studies of influence.

Right now I’m reading a book called “Wordweaving, The Science Of Suggestion” by Trevor Sylvestor, which is all about how to influence the human mind through the power of suggestion.

I remember that…

 

The first step – in preparing the mind to be receptive to a suggestion is to tell a story.

(There’s more to this, and if you want to learn all the details, you may want to consider picking up the book “Wordweaving“)

In any case, so I’m like – OK Step #1 – tell him a story.

What story could I tell?

All of a sudden, a perfect story flashes into my mind.

The story of the Invisible Counselors from Think And Grow Rich.

And so, we’re driving to school and I say..

“Boys, have you guys heard of the invisible counselors?”

and they’re like , “No, what’s that dad?”

And I’m like –

“Well you guys know Napoleon Hill, who wrote this book Think And Grow Rich that your dad talks about all the time right? “

And they’re like “Yeah.”

“Well did you know that Napoleon hill would, every night, visualize imaginary people sitting around this conference table?

People he wanted to be like.  

People like Abraham Lincoln,

Jesus and

Thomas Edison.”

And at this point, I can see the kids are leaning in a bit.

And then I tell them the extra – interesting part of the story – where Dr. Hill becomes a bit frightened because the characters seem to take on a life of their own & so he stops his imaginary meetings.

Until, of course, Abraham Lincoln appears to him in a dream and encourages him to continue.

And by now, my kids are really fascinated with what I’m telling them.

So I ask, “Why do you think Dr. Hill would imagine people he wanted to be like?”

And both of them knew the answer right off…

“So he could learn to become like them dad?”

That’s right boys.

& then we proceeded to talk a little about how important it is to think of people you want to become like – surround yourself with them & model them.

Now comes step 2 in conversational influence formula – Suggestion

Step 2 – according to this book I’m reading is to structure your suggestions in a way that the mind will be most receptive to receiving them.

So one of the language patterns I’ve been practicing is called a “Presupposition of possibility“.

This is just a fancy way of saying that the mind will be more open & receptive to things that might happen, things that could happen, or things that you can  do.

So I begin to ask my sons.

What do you think might happen, if we model people who have bad characteristics of bad qualities?

“Well, dad, I guess we could become like them.”

“And would it be a good thing to become like people who have bad qualities?”

“No dad.”

“That’s right boys.”

“Do you guys think that maybe, it would be a better idea – to model people with good qualities and characteristics?  

People we want to be like?”

“Yeah dad, that makes a lot more sense.”

“Yeah, I think so to boys.”

So now, we’re getting to the school and I’m thinking –

“what to do?  Should I just let him go to school with this jersey on?”

And just before Kayden opens the door, he says..

“Dad, I’m going to go ahead and take this jersey off.”

He takes it off and hands it to me and heads off to school.

I could hardly believe my eyes.

On the way home – I felt like the proudest dad in the world.

I mean, in 5 minutes, to take someone who was dead set on doing what they want to do,

…even to the point of argument, and turn the situation completely around so they not only want to do what you wanted them to do,

but they even think it’s their idea.

Incredible!  

So now, I’m thinking – that maybe, my friend,

…as you continue to read, expose yourself to transformational information & keep stepping forward in your business, you can influence your family, prospects & team in new & even more powerful ways.

Did you like this story or pick up any tips you can use in your life and business?  I’d love to hear your thoughts down below.

21 thoughts on “A Kid, A Dad, Language Tricks & Some Cool Tools Of Influence”

  1. It just goes to show you how kids pick up on little things that even though they might not know why, it is a lesson to remember their brains are still developing. And your inspiration and being the mentoring dad is a great example. Thanks for Paul for sharing, and loved the slow mo video!!

    Reply
  2. Wow Paul. That’s a great story. You have learned and put into action so many awesome principles through the years. You are a great inspiration to me, not only in business and life, but also the interactions you have with your boys. I am raising 2 daughters, a bit of a different challenge, but knowing how you personally deal with your boys, I can definitely relate. I will be reading many more of your posts from now on. Thanks so much for everything you do for me and our team. Awesome! 🙂

    Reply
    • Hey Joel,

      Wow.. thanks so much for the GREAT compliment and very kind words.

      I love how we can all get better by moving forward towards our own dreams and goals & sharing the lessons we’re picking up along the way.

      Excited to mee you in person in Nashville!

      Thanks again.

      Paul

      Reply
  3. I don’t have kids but I heard they are the best sales people in the world. Great job in influencing them to think for themselves =)

    Reply
  4. Now that’s a great story. For 2 reasons. It shows how you can use what you are learning in your business. But is also shows how some of these techniques are helpful in the family — how to win friend and INFLUENCE people. Thanks for the share Paul.

    Reply
    • Hey Carol,

      Thanks so very much.

      It’s true.

      Really – one of the BIGGEST benefits i’ve received from my 10 years in home business is how much better of a father I am BECAUSE of the things I’ve learned.

      Thanks for stopping by!

      Paul

      Reply
  5. This story makes me think of 1 Timothy 1:5, 6 and how fortunate we are to have sown faithfully and diligently that we may reap fully in these crucial moments with our children.

    I also think about how grateful I am that my own father was as kind and loving and patient with me as you are with your boys. Such a father is a priceless gift!

    Reply
    • Hey Kimberly,

      Were these the scriptures you were referring to?

      5 Now the end of the commandment is charity out of a pure heart, and of a good conscience, and of faith unfeigned:

      6 From which some having swerved have turned aside unto vain jangling;

      Just want to make sure I looked up the correct reference.

      And I agree – these are the moments that pay off for much of the time invested in personal develompent.

      So much more payoff to come right?

      Appreciate you!

      Paul

      Reply

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