The Day My Dad Left

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I’ll never forget the day my dad left. 

I was standing in the yard – watching his old 80’s model white pickup truck – loaded to the hilt with all his stuff, pull out of the driveway. 

I was 8 years old.  

I remember, a few tears falling down my face as I wondered how long it would be until I saw my dad again .

(Little did I know it wouldn’t be until his funural 10 years later). 

A month or so after he left, my mom wanted me to call & see how we was coming along at  his new job. 

He’d left because he found work in California and was going to be sending money back to my mom, little sister and I. 

So even though we were sad, we knew it was for a good reason that he’d decided to go away for a while. 

When my mom was a little girl, she lost her hearing during a life-threatening bout of Scarlet fever.  

Because of this challenge, when phone calls needed to be made for the family – it was up to me, an 8 year old boy, to make those calls. 

So there I was, standing next to the dresser that held up the phone,

….in the master bedroom of our 1978 double wide trailerhouse, with the phone up to my ear, listening to the sound of the “ring, ring ring”,

waiting with eager anticipation to talk to my dad. 

“Hello“, someone asnwered. 

“Hi, can I please speak to the manager?” 

(my dad was supposedly the manager at this hotel)

“Uh, no, I’m sorry, Kimberly’s not here right now” responded the voice on the other end of the line.  

My 8 year old heart sank. 

Kimberly was the lady my dad had been running around with prior to his departure. 

The lady that had contributed to some of the fights among my parents, and the tears shed by my mom. 

Turns out, that my dad had not left to be the manager of a hotel after all. 

He’d abandoned our little family, to be with another woman. 

Fast forward 27 years. 

I’m working out in the gym this morning and I see a Facebook message pop through. 

It’s a voice message. 

I’m just about done with my workout so I click play – to hear what my friend David Query, an over the road trucker, has to say to me on this fine Monday morning.  

David begins to describe a breakthrough he just had, while listening to a training I had put together for him.  

My eyes widen, my ears perk up – I lean in eagerly to catch the next part of the message as he describes where the breakthrough came. 

I had been telling my story – which includes the part about my dad leaving when I was 8 years old – and I used an interesting set of words to describe the experience of my dad leaving my family. 

“Unfortunately, or fortunately, depending on how you choose to look at it, my dad left my family when I was 8 years old” I said.  

You see, I learned years ago – from studying the book Think And Grow Rich, that

“In every apparent setback lies the seed of an equal or greater advantage.”  

I’ve invested a lot of time and thought analyzing the experiences of my life, to see if that statement just might be true.  

When I think back upon the experience of my dad leaving, from the hindsight of a 27 year distance, here’s what I see.  

  • A little 8 year old boy, who was forced to take responsibility at an early age. 
  • A small child – who, because his mom and little sister were depending upon on him – had to develop communication skills to help the family out.  
  • All the experiences of missing my dad at important events like Father-Son campouts, church gatherings, pinewood derby’s etc.- that forged inside of me – the desire to provide for my future family – in a way that I might like to have experienced myself, as a child.      

I realize now, that my dad leaving my family when he did, was actually a blessing in disguise. 

An greater advantage in the setback. 

A tree in the seed. 

And now, I’m grateful, that my friend David was able to see something in my story that he hadn’t seen before.  

And now, he’s going to be able to see new things in life – that have always been there,

…but have remained ever so slightly hidden, because he was viewing them with an old set of glasses.  

And the ripple effect – of that blessing of my dad leaving, continues and continues and continues to pay back – and pay back and pay back. 

I wonder what experiences have happened and are happening in your life, that are forcing your seed to sprout forth and grow into the mighty Oak tree, that maybe you’re destined to become.

Fascinating isn’t it?  

Thanks for reading my friend, and remember – Lady wisdom stands ever over us – as we continue to journey through life, reminding us… 

To see the TREE in the Seed.  

Do you believe there is the seed of something greater in every adverse experience?  Do you have similar experiences?  Please share with me below.

 

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26 thoughts on “The Day My Dad Left”

  1. I absolutely agree 100%with the theory you live by and choose to see life 🙂 I too feel the same way! Awesome post! You are an awesome writer and story-teller!

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  4. Couldn’t have expressed this better myself and can so relate to the responsibilities of having to be an adult at the age of 8 or 9 – been there and done that! Not fun, but I love the way you express this- A Tree within the Seed! truly indeed:)

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  7. Wow Paul: Reading this story made me stop completely what I was doing and pay attention to your story. What an inspiring story this is and I can say that so many thousands of people can say they know or have been touched by your messages. I for one am so happy to be one of them. You are such an inspiration and encouragement to me!

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  8. Thank you for the mention here… your words and your wisdom bless me daily. Your heart and soul are out there for us to benefit from with each call and each post. We’ve come a long way since that first call (that I listened to) where your positivity was at that point in my life as grating as nails on a chalkboard! But for some reason, I came back… then fell away… then came back again… KNOWING that you and the T&GR family are like the Motel 6… You’ll always be there, and you’ll leave the light on for me no matter how far afield I’ve wandered. ONWARD!

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  9. What a great story Paul! I enjoyed hearing it from your positive perspective! It is a good reminder to us all that not everything is as bad as it might seem at the time.

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  10. With the character you’ve sown, Paul, I am so very humbled and grateful to be part of the destiny you are reaping – wave after wave of Freedom Crusaders stepping into our better futures. Powerful.

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    • ha ha..

      Well I can say the same thing right back at ya Kimberly Skinner.

      Humbled, honored and grateful to see even MORE freedom crusaders stepping out into something better.

      Together, we can’t be stopped.

      🙂

      Paul

      Reply

  11. Wow! Paul never heard this part of your life’s journey. Amazing what you did to change your life to become a success. Love your morning Think and Grow Rich calls yoo! You’re an inspiration.

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  13. Wow Paul I want to thank you for sharing this story that is very personal to you I am sure and sharing it with us truly truly shows your true character and I Truly commend you for who you are and appreciate you for who you are
    and again thank you my friend

    Reply

    • Hey thanks Terrence… My pleasure my friend..

      I shared it in hopes that others can learn from my story.

      It’s not about what happens to you, it’s about what you DO about what happens that really matters right?

      Appreciate you man!

      Paul

      Reply

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